The passage of time

Time passes and life goes on.

Such a simple, obvious statement, but I think it takes all of us by surprise at one time or another.  

It's been the best part of a year since I posted but I think I've needed a year to get over last year and everything it threw at us.  At times I've felt like someone's been playing a cruel game of "Buckeroo" with me but slowly, over time, I've been able to put those weights and burdens down.  I woke up one day and I felt lighter.  There comes a point where feeling sorry for yourself and like the universe is out to get you get's more tiring than what has actually happened.  I needed to accept it and move on rather than wallow in self pity....but I needed time to wallow in order to accept it...so erm...yeah...

The first half of this year were very hard and at times I wasn't sure how anything was going to end...or, indeed if it ever would end.  When everything seems so dark, when you feel lost and you have no idea how to explain what's going on in your head, it's hard to write anything down...so I didn't.  The second half of this year (after I pulled myself together) has been full of eager anticipation and uncertainty...well, I guess the whole year has been fraught with uncertainty...but uncertain in a hopeful way.  I've been too busy with three mental exuberant children to bother writing a blog post...I started a few but never finished them. ...and then there was the mental barrier of coming back after so long not posting.  Stupid really, as I write this for me, so who am I embarrassed to....oh..that would be me.  Whoops.

But time has passed and life has gone on, seasons change, cake is eaten...boys have got taller...and life is quite exciting for us right now.

We're months...and months into the process of moving house.  If I never have to talk to another solicitor or estate agent again, after this is all over, then I'll be a happy bunny.  But today is an exciting day.  We hopefully will finally exchange, which means a week today we're going to be the proud owners of a new house.  A house that we will stay in at least until our children have grown and left home.  It's a complete curve ball.  We're country people at heart and envisaged moving somewhere more rural, but here we are, moving into the centre of a little Suffolk town.  Both Mr B and I have lived there before, separately and is the only town I think I could live in.  It's only 5 minutes down the road from where we are now, so we're still surrounded by family.

It has bay windows, a kitchen I could literally swing a cat in (watch out Catsby), a basement to lock the kids in  convert into a play room and enough space for us to not constantly be under each other's feet.

So yes.  There is much excitement at the prospect of a fresh start.

...and after last year, I really think we deserve one...


It'll always be Howard's House.  No matter where we are.